Valentine's Day Is Over--I wish
Oh, that old Billy Bragg song. . . .what to write? How does a single woman approaching 40 write about Valentine's day without being too cynical or too sappy? How many presents can one get for oneself without it becoming an empty cliche?I went to bed last night thinking about all the machinations women go through--fretting and worrying about whether they'll get married, have a family, be able to manage a career, blah blah blah. And I got very resentful when I realized that men probably don't lie awake at night worrying about these things at all! I also bet that they don't have strange totems tied together with red string in their 'love' corner; or sleep only on one side of the bed in order to 'make room' for their soon-come beloved; or leave half of their closets empty; or any of the other strange, bordering-on-superstitious, behaviors of single women trying to attract a mate.
So, I decided that this year--besides the lovely little raw chocolate brownies made by Kirnjot that I highly recommend--I was going to give myself the best gift any woman approach 40 could possibly give herself: I'm going to liberate myself from all such machinations of folly. I'm going to sleep in the middle of my new, huge, queen-sized bed. I'm going to use every single closet in my apartment. I'm going to clear out all my superstitious totems to 'love' and its incredible sway over my psyche. I'm going to quit wishing and hoping and dreaming and all such gerands of grandeur and I'm going to just be in my life--as it is--right now.
I feel better already. Happy Valentine's Day!
posted by Sat Purkh Kaur Khalsa @ 3:54 PM
6 Comments:
Kinda felt weird reading what just wrote.
I mean, theres a solution to it all, but it seems as if you enjoy your current position and plan on keeping it. Good job.
Well the solution is just to live in the flow and allow Guru to act, if that's what you mean. My husband--should there be one--will be delivered by God and guru and not by any machinations or maneuvers on my part.
Your interpretation that I'm content in my current position is a complete mis-read of the intent of the posting. Perhaps my irony doesn't translate?
Happy Valentine's Day--and I mean that in the most uncynical way I can muster.
I guess a lot of men probably don't think too much about getting married, but I've been there for a few years now. I really hoped that I'd get married before 30, but I'll be 27 this year and I just don't see it happening. I've also thought about the closet thing. All I can think is, it's better if we have two closets and both have to be big :-)
I like your approach to Valentines day. Isn't it such a phoney consumer holiday? (doesn't mean I don't celebrate it - lol) I hope you also have a happy Valentines day.
Sat Naam.
Prabhu--if you're only 27 and you want to get married by 30 you've got plenty of time....don't worry. There are lots of beautiful, talented, fabulous, compassionate women in the community and around the world. I'm sure one of them will suit you.
Although for me, when I didn't get married by the time I was 30 (ah that magical number), I had this moment of sublime freedom. I was off the hook, all bets were off, etc. etc.
Happy Valentine's Day to you too!
My goodness! Do women do those things? Honest, I have never heard of that (well, except the fung shui thing). Perhaps that's why I'm single? Sadly, I don't think my cats are willing to sleep on just part of the bed to make room for anyone. Selfish little beasts.
If it adds any light/irony/horror to the whole Valentine thing, I spent all day with middle schoolers. The air quivered with expectation and all the girls dressed up in reds and pinks and ribbons. But then again, one boy came in a red suit with sequined top hat, and another made a red tie out of duct tape and attached a rose to it. Mostly, they were all sugared up and completely exhausting to be with.
Are you still coming to visit?
Tamara
Imagining you in a school class room full of hormones and knocking radiators makes me smile.
My cats also enjoy the new queen bed--they sprawl all over it--although they tend to still want to be somewhat on top of me.
I am still coming next weekend and look forward to being back in the city! Yeah! see you soon.
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