Greetings from the Land of Enchantment: Return to Life

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

Return to Life

I've come down from two weeks on the Mountain, Ram Das Puri, and the return to regular civilian life seems strange--a bit disconcerting. From living in a tent, to a house full of guests, to being back to my regular, mundane routine. Others left the mountain for fabulous places around the world--and I returned to work to write a five-year vision, which is entirely appropriate since my life is here. But this time, somehow, it just didn't seem to fit.

I feel myself trying to stretch out and beyond my normal, comfortable limits. I feel myself compelled to reach beyond my usual grasp. I feel myself wanting to expand. Maybe it was the air at Ram Das Puri. The notion of being inside now feels claustrophobic, suffocating even. I can no longer take comfort in the notion of being small. This little life, which for so long was home to me, now feels foreboding, ominous. I can't breathe.

Yet, I do. I breathe and I live and I work and I feed the animals and I catch up on the news and I bow to my life as it is. My expansion will have to arise in sadhana. My limitlessness will have to express itself through my songs. My love will have to flow through my own breath.

That breath which comes and goes and comes again. I am here--living--and it's good. I sat behind the guru on Sunday for a long time--and in that seat I recognized how much I had changed and continue to change: how much I had blossomed, how much I had left behind, and how much I still have to let go of. I saw myself for the first time in a long time--and I smiled--because life is good and love is limitless.

May your journey
always return you
to the home of your heart

and may you always
know that you have a home
in mine


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