Facing Fear
A friend loaned me Cheri Huber's Book on Fear in light of my recent panic attacks. . . .one thing that really struck me was her exhortation: when it's really scary is when it's getting good--keep going! There is so much I'm looking at in my own life--my own fears, attachment, aversion, etc. Eating myself alive--literally and figuratively. The weight continues to drop off without effort even as I consciously look at my mind and make effort to eat it alive--catch it while it's still ripe with wrong-thinking. Because if I catch it then, it's less likely to come back around and kick me in the a___.I have a mild form of agoraphobia, which is another way of saying I don't like to leave home. As a friend put it years ago, "Your world is soooo small." I used to believe that I made up for it with an eclectic and creative interior world; but no longer. The world is calling and I must answer. My friend looked at me today and said, "Your letting this one thing in your life that isn't even real ruin the opportunity and experience you're actually having! You've been given the opportunity to sing--the thing you've longed for your entire life--and you're wasting it with regret and anxiety and worry over something you have no control over. Snap out of it! Let it go!"
So I'm saying goodbye. Goodbye to things I can't control. Goodbye to fear. Goodbye to attachment and it's brother-in-arms aversion. Goodbye to my own ego which creates this whole mess in the first place. Of course, this will have to be a daily goodbye--the ego won't give up so easily, which means a daily hello to surrender, to the opportunities the world affords me, and the friendships proffered. So it's hello and goodbye.
hello and goodbye
my love
hello to a new day
a new way to be
in the world
the breath
the in and the out--
along with the ins
and outs
hello to a new place
a new space to be
on the earth
walking
one step and another
along with those
two steps forward
and the many steps
back
goodbye to desiring
goodbye to fighting
goodbye to staying
full of fear
hello to loving
hello to dying
hello to flying
free from fear
hello and goodbye
my love
posted by Sat Purkh Kaur Khalsa @ 7:31 PM
1 Comments:
wonderful! stay in high spirits all the time.
Surrender oneself and the pure light will guide us. Past is not in our hands and so is the future, but the present moment is, therefore enjoy it with sweet words in praising that ultimate energy!!! Life is too short to worry about everything and go with the flow (wind). Where ever it takes you keep on working hard and never give up because of fear over which we have no control.
Even those new green leaves which sprung out of the tree branches last spring knows that their lifetime is very short, few months! But still these leaves continue to provide green lush and keep on cleaning the environment. And when fall gets near these leaves know that their end time is around the corner. Instead of falling in to fear or depression these leaves show their vibrant colors of red, yellow and orange. They don't even show one ounce of sorrow but leave this world with great joy. As they fall off the branches on the side roads or the ground they still hope to be touched by a saints feet.
So, at least we are human beings then why should we worry alot about uncertainty, instead meditate with love in tune into that frequency where there is no effects of time and space.
Gurinder "G"
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